Poetic Therapy - Read at Your Own Risk

I think for this next post, post number 4, I'll copy my short musings and poetry I titled "Poetic Therapy". Sorry this is all jumbled and not formatted right, this blog format is whacky.

One - Hindsight
The problem with living in the best times of your life, is you never know you're in them, till you've lived all the rest. 

Two - Truman Show
Ever hope the clouds will just open up and reveal the actual world you're supposed to be in like the Truman show?

Three - Gift

God gave me this gift
That I don't know how to open.

Four - Screaming
Writing is like screaming at the world
And hoping someone hears. 

Five - Smile

Why is it so hard to smile at a stranger?
Will they think I'm senile?
What is it that makes it weird?
It's like my soul is naked.
Turning my eyes away,
Covers me up.

Six - Cold
I like the cold because I can feel something. 

Seven - Lust
I want you to lust after the beauty of my soul.

Eight - Musings
You create memories, I create musings.
Both are pleasing to the soul.

Nine - Innerworld
My mind is a complicated innerworld where a different language is spoken

Ten - My Heart Lies To Me
My heart lies to me.

Yesterday you hurt me, so I cut you off. 
It was me without you. 
Today you made it right, so I let you back in. 
Now, I can't live without you.

Eleven - Accountable
I feel like I can't be held accountable for the person I was yesterday.

Twelve - My Heart Has Two Extremes
My heart has two extremes: you're nothing or you're everything. 

Thirteen - You Never Changed My Life
It's too easy for me act like you never changed my life. 

Fourteen - Erase You From My Heart
I'll erase you from my heart like you were never there. And keep on moving.

Fifteen - You Never Existed
I have the power of making me feel like you never existed.

Sixteen - Space

Sometimes a song can put me in a space I didn't know I needed to be.

Seventeen - Cry

I don't cry when others do and I wonder is it because I care too little or because I care too much?

Eighteen - Hiding

Somewhere out there is a person as dark and bright as me, but they're hiding too.

Nineteen - See Too Much

I'm cursed and blessed. I see what others don't. I see too much. 

Twenty - Sanity

Will you choose your sanity or me?

Twenty-one - Follow Me

Take my hand, follow me. I'll show you things you were never meant to see.

Twenty-two - God

I still wonder what God was thinking when he  created me. I feel like he was in a weird space that day. 

Twenty-three - World

I wish the world understood me as well as I understand myself.

Twenty-four - Remind Me

Sometimes a song is all I need to remind me why I love you.  

Twenty - Five - Those Times

Ya know when someone says something several times and you still can't hear them so you smile and say yeah?
I feel like my soul is made from those times. 

Twenty-six - Take Me Away

Something is calling my name.

I can feel it in my bones.

Peel these curtains back.

There must be more than this.

This can't be all there is.

Its like a bad joke.

I've been misplaced.

My insides are trying to crawl out.

I need to see

New people,

New places.

My heart is dead

And I need it pumping again.

Take me away

So I can feel again.

Twenty-seven - Come Alive

I want to test the limits
And do the unexpected.
Go against the norms
To make me come alive.

Twenty-eight - Dead

I'm dead

Until I can prove I'm alive.

Twenty-nine - Urge

I have the overwhelming urge to go to a place crowded with people

And just scream.

Thirty - Sunshine

I selfishly like the rain because others can't flaunt their sunshine.

Thirty-one - Acceptance

We had a need for acceptance.
You by others and me by you. 

Thirty-Two - You Are My Favorite Part

If life was a story
I'd read every page,
But I'd keep coming back to you.
You are my favorite part.

Thirty - Three - Save My Smiles

I save my smiles for special occasions,
The times that have earned it.

Thirty-four - Used To

I used to love to run.
Now, I only run to doctor's appointments.
I used to make him meals.
Now, I'm barely making it.

Thirty-five - Relating

Writing is like relating to nobody and everybody at the same time. 

Thirty-six - Message In a Bottle

Writing is like throwing a message in a bottle into the ocean and hoping the right person finds it. 

Thirty-seven - Lies By Omission

When I write, I tell the truth.
I say the secret things I can't say out loud.
No one can get hurt.
No one can judge.
But, I wonder,
Are the words I don't speak out loud
Lies by omission?

Thirty-eight - Not Allowed

Writing let's me say the things I'm not allowed to say. 

Thirty-Nine - Let Me Sleep

When I sleep,
you're in my dreams.
Don't wake me up
to a life you're not in.
Let me sleep.

Forty- Capture

Sometimes a song is like a camera,
It captures a moment in time,
Immortalizing it forever.

Forty-One- Apathy
You can't write without feeling,
even if that feeling is apathy. 

Forty-Two- Stands Still
Time moves on, but the grief stands still.

Forty-Three- Miss You
The fact that I still miss you, is a testament to how much I loved you. The fact that I have to keep it a secret, is a testament to how much I love him. 

Forty-Four- Music
Was the music really that good,
Or was it that moment?
A moment filled with possibility, the unknown, youth, freedom,
And a hint of Rebellion.
I wish I could take everything that moment was made up of,
Bottle it up,
And listen to every song through that filter.
Music today for me,
is just not the same,
But unfortunately, I don't think it's the artists,
But the listener. 

Forty-Five - Obsess
Let me obsess about it and get back to you. 

Forty-Six - Perpetrator and Victim
You're mad because I told you how you hurt me. You can't be the perpetrator and the victim for the same crime. 

Forty-Seven - Battle

Poetry is how I slay when I'm too wise to go to battle. 

Forty-Eight - Mask

Me when I sit down to write poetry-
"Hold my mask..."

Forty-Nine - Sorry

I'm sorry I made you feel that way, but I'm not sorry I said it.